Staying at a hotel can feel like a delightful escape from the reality of day-to-day life. After all, most of us don’t have access to room service, mysterious new bath products or complimentary breakfast in our usual routines.
But hotel stays can also come with their fair share of downsides and funny moments. The cost of minibar items and fees added to the nightly room rate can certainly come as a surprise.
As with other life experiences, the hilarious folks on X, formerly known as Twitter, have found ways to laugh about it. We’ve rounded up 35 funny and relatable tweets about hotel stays.
I am 32 years old and still deeply terrified that consuming anything from the hotel room minibar will bankrupt my entire family somehow
— Armand Domalewski (@ArmandDoma) August 21, 2021
Whoever makes hotel lotion needs to answer for their crimes. Leaves skin ashier than before you put it on.
— Uju Anya (@UjuAnya) January 15, 2023
Hotels be like, it’s $150 a night and you’re staying 2 nights so that brings your total to $947.43.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 26, 2023
tbt to when i accidentally booked a non-refundable hotel and i was trying to get exp*dia to cancel it like 2 minutes after booking and they said, “no… but we can change the date” so i asked them to change it to the year 2099 and they just refunded me 😭
— rebecca (@abcdrih) October 19, 2022
Why do hotels think people want to stare into the bathroom from the bed?
— roxane gay (@rgay) October 26, 2023
I confused this hotel’s body lotion bottle with the identically colored conditioner bottle so I took two showers today and the hair on my arms and legs have never been softer how are youuuu
— Lin-Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel) March 7, 2018
It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.
— Sarah Sweeney (@heysarahsweeney) February 2, 2020
Hotel air conditioners are the McDonalds sprite of air conditioning
— 𝔐⚘ (@DizzyCheema) March 21, 2022
Hotels should let you check out at the same time you checked in not no damn 11am
— SWAVY 🥇 (@thouxanbanlee) September 10, 2021
I really don’t know what to say about my hotel room view pic.twitter.com/LrLmwi1az2
— Alana Herrnson (@aperiplatypus) June 23, 2022
Inventor of hotel room coffee: What if you could drink Hell?
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) July 29, 2022
What is more embarrassing the fact that I just washed my hair with the hotel body lotion or the fact that this isn’t the first time?
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) June 12, 2013
Those magnifying mirrors in hotel rooms be like “hey real quick let me show you some areas you didn’t know about before that you should now be self conscious about ok thanks.”
— John Crist (@johnbcrist) July 14, 2019
me at hotel: *pushing all the continental breakfast tables together*
hotel security: miss why are you-
me: PANGEA BREAKFAST
— keely flaherty (@keelyflaherty) December 14, 2016
this hotel kindly invites me to decide whether I am BODYGUARD or VAMPIRE pic.twitter.com/9VediAqR3j
— Jennifer Cownie (@cownifer) February 5, 2019
Want to know what a good homemaker I am? We’re in a hotel room and 5 got in the closet and said, “hey, why is there a surf board in here!?”
An ironing board, he saw an ironing board.
— Momsense Ensues (@momsense_ensues) July 24, 2022
I think hotels set their rates based on how hard the shower is to figure out.
— Alex Baze (@bazecraze) June 25, 2013
ME CALLING ROOM SERVICE: Yeah can you describe the mac and cheese to me like is it fancy and weird with twigs and shit in it or is it the classic solid rectangle that harkens one back to a rainy day in junior high hello are you there
— Karen Kilgariff (@KarenKilgariff) November 9, 2018
Can you read this in a hotel shower without glasses? Is it body lotion, or is it poison? pic.twitter.com/TuW1IN0YVb
— Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) November 12, 2019
Geeky Humor: Photon checks into a hotel. Bellhop asks, “You have any luggage?” The Photon replies, “No, I’m traveling light!”
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) July 23, 2017
I am sooooo anti family friendly hotels 😭 as soon as I see a water slide in the hotel pics I close the tab
— Miss Wanty🏾 (@ElleKay_XO) October 16, 2023
Why are hotel rooms always designed so that you end up having to see yourself ironing naked?
— Te Radar (@teradar) February 3, 2022
Hotel room service on February 15th looking at y’alls rose petals all over the place pic.twitter.com/gRyxEZKsRA
— consigliere ³⁵ (@moyodre) January 22, 2020
Can hotels please stop making see through bathrooms a thing, tqvm.
— 🧙♀️Nenek Hani🐈🐈 (@NenekHani) November 28, 2021
Not sure I’ll ever understand a hotel that boasts 600 threadcount sheets and plush, cozy robes providing toiletpaper and tissue made of sandpaper. 😬🤷🏽♀️🤬
— Bonnie Gillespie (she|her) (@bonniegillespie) July 25, 2018
I would enjoy my hotel stay so much more if there were fewer full length mirrors in play. Keep the mystery alive it’s called a VACATION
— carla lalli music (@lallimusic) November 12, 2019
I can only go on holiday with people that like nice hotels. I appreciate a bargain but I’m not staying in a dungeon just because it’s £29 cheaper, just don’t invite me
— ً (@TweetXan_) February 20, 2021
Dear Parents,
As you book your summer vacations, don’t forget that all your kids really want to do is swim in a hotel pool.— Meredith (@PerfectPending) May 31, 2016
Every hotel has an ironing board that works like every other ironing board, and a shower whose operation requires careful study and a bit of luck
— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) November 19, 2021
The designers who upgraded hotel bathrooms with frosted glass doors neglected to take the midnight pee into account.
— Terri Paella Piñata (@terrip38) September 7, 2023
The sole purpose of hotel room coffee is to enable the procurement of actual coffee.
— RanaAwdishMD (@RanaAwdish) October 11, 2019
for some reason my hotel room has 2 toilets and i have been using them equally so neither one “feels left out” in case you’re wondering how i’m doing
— limp brittzkit (@Brittymigs) October 29, 2023
Me walking to the free continental breakfast at the Marriott inn https://t.co/hGO4xw41aM
— CHRIS KLEMENS (@ChrisKlemens) June 23, 2019
thinkin about booking a fancy hotel room tonight just to sit in a fluffy robe and order chocolate cake on room service and not talk to anyone but myself for 22 hours
— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) May 3, 2019
It’s nice that hotels keep a bible in the room, so while you’re committing sins you can check to make sure you don’t miss any.
— Count Reverend Scott (@Reverend_Scott) September 12, 2013